Depression

When the coffin was laid in her daughter's grave 
she left with the daughter she could not save

i obsessed on how long it took
 for life to return 
to the walking dead 

I had never seen a face so dressed in grief
a massacre of guilt for a life so brief 

I had never seen a woman,so finished with life
 a woman once brave 
holding her ache between her porous fingers
bent down by her soul's weight

i thought her whole being would start to pour,to bleed
it scoured my insides clean
hollowed me for years
to see her  sparkle wither 
her bones give way

When the sun in our sky refuses to shine
and our hope has been melted down to nothingness
when our reflection isn't something we can stand to look at 
and we have clawed the Gods for answers for our dead sons and daughters
woken up with dawn only to crumble with fatigue 
when food ceases to  taste 
and we do not hear the words anymore
'eat,eat,stay alive'
and we do not live the words anymore

when our souls become echoing halls
empty empty 
we learn sorrow is the hardest season
so much is wilting
 tears are falling 
 but no amount of falling 
falling on the ground can get us to fall asleep 

When we only hear  the words
you could have done better 
you could have done better
you could have

we should know we need to let go
God knows we do